My life tends to be a cycle of the social butterfly & the solitary one. My soul starts yearning for quiet when life has been too busy and vice versa - when I have been alone too long, I crave the company of others.
However, right now, I thirst for solitude but, I can't escape the busyness of my social calendar and work priorites. I feel myself almost screaming for quiet. Two or three days by myself is all I need but evenings and days are filled with appointments, meetings, get-togethers until August 12. And I don't want to break any of my committments because if I give my word and make plans with people, it is important to keep it.
The problem is I never know when my soul needs its solitary time or as I affectionally call it "Sara Time". It creeps up on me and then I begin to feel resentment towards those around me which is so not fair to them.
If only I could figure myself out - despite 32 years of practise! I know I am a balance between introvert and extrovert. I enjoy being by myself and thrive being with other people too. But I never know which one I need until it is sometimes too late. However, this too shall pass, as someone famous once said...
3 comments:
I know what you mean. I am the same way. Maybe it runs in the family.
Amen, cousin! I've discovered, though, in the past few months, that other people are surprisingly forgiving when I've spread myself to thin and have (begrudgingly, and with a great sense of guilt) actually canceled something. Funny thing - turns out that other people are often in the same boat and are sometimes as relieved as me to take a rain-check! This doesn't solve anything, but can be a relief sometimes. I remember saying once that wishing once that I could be hospitalized for some minor malady so that I could lay in bed for a day, blow off some obligations, and not feel guilty! I don't think I really meant it, but it sounded like a good idea at the time!
know that you are loved... introvert or extrovert..young or old...strong or weak...awake or asleep. xoxoxo
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